Hilarities (Jewry in England-- Peter Aldag)

Dry Bones or Pounds of Flesh?

• Jewish usury had gotten so bad that holy relics were held by Jews as collateral, even the very bones of saints.
  • “In 1175, Richard, Archbishop of Canterbury went to Peterborough Abbey to depose the local abbot, William of Walterville, because he had entered the monastery with the help of soldiers against the will of the monks and by force of arms had seized the bones of the saints that he had pledged to the Jews for money.” (22)

The Coronation of Richard the Lionheart

• The Jews were banned from Richard the Lionheart’s coronation, but they tried to show up anyway and bribe the king. The people were angered by the Jews’ arrogance and attacked them, leading to a general pogrom.
  • “On September 3rd, 1189, Richard the Lionheart was crowned King of England, a day that was extremely important for the history of the Jews in ancient England. From that point on they lost power and wealth until they were finally forced to leave the country. Subjects had flocked to London from all parts of the Angevin Empire, including from the then English possessions in France. The Jews had also sent their leaders to this event. For whatever reason — some say superstition,” others antipathy towards the Jews” — the king, at the instigation of Baldwin, Archbishop of Canterbury, passed a law prohibiting Jews from entering Westminster Abbey or his palace during the coronation, and they were forbidden on pain of death to enter during the banquet. This order was publicly announced on the same day by heralds proclaiming it in the streets and posting notices of it in prominent places so that everyone in the city knew about it in good time. A large crowd had gathered near the church and the palace, including numerous Jews. These Jews carried expensive gifts for the king and, despite the ban, were desirous to present them to him that same day in homage. It is not entirely clear whether they had only got as far as the gates of the palace or had already reached the king” when the ‘foreigners’, or what other call ‘the mob’, pounced on them. In any case, the crowd was outraged at the presumption of the Jews to disregard the king's decree. Margoliouth laments this outrage, the fact that ‘the most loyal subjects, the most patriotic Englishmen, and the oldest settlers in the realm’ had been driven back by brute force; for they could not have known anything about the decree that had been proclaimed just the day before.” That this was not the majority view is evidenced by the behaviour of the crowd, who themselves knew about the ban and were therefore upset by the behaviour of the Jews. Threatening fists were brandished and soon blows began to rain down. The crowd became more and more agitated and finally attacked the Jews with sticks. Spectators standing at a greater distance saw and heard the commotion, believing that the king himself had ordered the Jews’ expulsion because they had violated his ban. By the time the Jews tried to escape, most of them had already been killed.” False news spread like wildfire that the king himself had ordered the massacre. The population had been waiting for a long time for the king to give them a free hand, and now what had to come after all of the abuses finally happened: the people armed themselves and killed every Jew in sight unless he allowed himself to be baptised.” Among those baptised was one of York's leading Jews, Benedict of York. When he was brought before the king a short time later, he again described himself as a Jew. He was allowed to live out of contempt for his fickleness and cowardice. The rioting in London continued into the day after the coronation. The king's attempts to suppress the riots were in vain given the anger of the people. The Jews withdrew into their fortified houses, which the English tried repeatedly to break into without success. Fires were then thrown onto the roofs, and the Jews burned to death in their homes. In some cases the fire spread to English buildings nearby, and the tumult in London was indescribable.” (22-3)

Jews Lock Friendly Commander out from His Own Castle

• During the York Uprising, a commander helped out the Jews, and when he left, they locked him out!
  • “Most of the Jews of York reached the castle under cover of darkness, where the royal commander gave them refuge. When one day he left the castle for a short time, on his return the Jews refused to let him back in. They had now made themselves masters of the castle. The commander summoned royal troops and, together with the angry citizens, stormed the castle. After the besieged Jews realised that their situation was hopeless, some of them killed themselves, while the rest surrendered, but were killed anyway by the embittered people.” (28)

Jewish Arrogance Not Tolerated in Middle Ages

• “The next day a distinguished Jewish doctor, well known in King’s Lynn, insulted the people and prophesied vengeance. This incited the still furious population, who seized him and killed him.” (28)

• Coin-Clipping as “Circumcision”
  • “It may interest English-speaking readers to know that the German word used here for clipping [of coins] — Beschneidung — has the double meaning of circumcision.” Translator’s note from Footnote 125 (32)

The One-Toothed Jew

• In 1210, all of the Jews were arrested and brought together into one place in Bristol to pay taxes because they’d been falsifying reports to the exchequer.
• “It is reported that a Jew from Bristol, who had refused to pay the sum of around £7,330, had a tooth pulled out every day that he refused to pay up, and that he only agreed to make the payment when he had a single tooth left.” (38)

New Swords in Old Wineskins

• Jews betrayed Christian civilization. Instead of poisoning the enemies of Christians, they attempted to arm them instead.
  • “At this time, there was fierce fighting in Eastern Europe against the Tartars and Cumans, who had invaded Europe from the East. The Jews, particularly those in Germany, believed that these nomadic warrior tribes from the Eurasian Steppes were descendants of the lost tribes of Israel, and, in Prynne’s words ‘believing, that the Tartars were of their own Nation, entered into a secret League with them, to destroy the Christians, and subdue the whole world to themselves’. As a first way of assisting the invaders, the Jews decided to purchase and send weapons. However, this could under no circumstance be allowed to become known to the Christian world, which is why the following plan was devised.
• The rumour was spread, which was all too readily believed, that the Jews had received an order for wine from the Tartars, because, as the Tartars were Jews, they would only drink wine harvested by Jews. The Jews had agreed to deliver thirty casks of this wine. But in order to do the Christian world a service, they would poison it so that a large number of the Tartars would die as a result.
• The Christian princes agreed, seeing nothing amiss with the Jews' stated plan. In fact, however, the Jews had secretly packed a large quantity of swords and knives into the hogsheads and it was only through the diligence of the German Customs officials that the crime was discovered and fittingly punished.” (44)
  • Since there is some doubt about the veracity of this story, it is included under Hilarities instead of Evidence. Still, the story rings true. The documented cases of the gates of Toledo and the Mamilla Pool Massacre are just two of the many examples in history of Jews betraying Christians to the hands of foreign invaders. Today, they do it continually with their aid organizations, bringing in unwanted migrants to Europe. [The Massacre of Christians at Mamilla Pool, 614 A.D.] [Do you happen to know of a good source that talks about the gates of Toledo and similar cases?]
    • Another example appears later in Aldag. Sir Robert Inglis reported that “In one of the wars of the last century, the Jews were expelled from Bohemia for assisting an invading army”. (453)

Edward I’s Attempt to Make Jews Honest

• Aldag: “He wanted to take away from the Jews the detestable profession of usurer, which is so detrimental to the people, and in its stead create a new, better existence for the Hebrews. But the king did not take into account the true character of the Jews.” (59)
  • Later, Aldag says something similar about Napoleon: “We cannot go into detail here about this valiant attempt by Napoleon, but it is obvious to anyone familiar with the Jewish character that his efforts, like those of the noble King Edward I of England before him, would naturally be doomed to failure.” (417)

Coin-Clipping: They Just Can’t Help Themselves

• The Jews were given chance after chance for consecutive years to stop coin-clipping and they stubbornly refused to reform after being given the sternest warnings.
• “In 1278, immediately after the Jews were tried for the coin crimes, Edward set about putting England's currency back in order. He gradually removed all of the damaged coins from circulation that could be found, and replaced them with new ones. He also set a point in time, announced by public proclamation, at which the old coins would no longer be legal tender. At the end of the same year, the replacement of the coinage was considered complete.

• In 1282 the king started to receive complaints about the new coins being devalued. Counterfeit coins were also starting to reappear in the new circulation. The king set up a commission of enquiry with a decree dated February 6th, 1283, and the investigators discovered that it was once more the work of the Jews. The guilty were certainly punished, although nothing is known about how.
• Apparently, however, all of the measures did not have the intended success in eradicating the problem, because the next year [September 15th, 1284] a new decree was issued for the commission to investigate and punish the Jews dealing in real and counterfeit silver plate, as made from coin clipping.
• Although hard to believe, even this new crackdown still did not produce the desired outcome. Some chroniclers speak of a general persecution of Jews in 1286 without, however, giving the reasons for it. Still others relate that in 1287 all of the Jews were thrown into prison because they had committed new money crimes, and were only released after paying a fine of £12,000.”
• However, this operation may not have been completed until 1288, because King Edward again issued a decree on January 26th, 1288, which indicated that the Jews were still active as coin clippers and counterfeiters [given that they were still buying and selling real and counterfeit silver plate]. As a result, the commissioners were ordered to take whatever action was deemed necessary to deal with the problem.” (67)

The Cartoonishly Evil Rodrigo Lopez

• “He was one of the great schemers of his time and had a burning desire to get rich as quickly as possible… in 1586 he was even appointed personal physician to the queen,’ whose special trust he enjoyed and who used to initiate him into the most secret affairs of state. With Elizabeth's knowledge, he came into contact with the Spanish king, whom she deeply hated, and to whom he appeared to be working exclusively in his service. While he initially revealed unimportant things about Spain to the queen, he deliberately concealed from her all the important matters that had become known to him. Later he went a step further and informed Spain about all sorts of details of events at the English court,' and even suggested to the king that he poison Elizabeth. He demanded fifty thousand gold escudos, or crowns [equivalent to £18,800 in the English pounds of the day], for this villainous deed, which were to be deposited abroad before the crime. The King of Spain hesitated because of the enormity of the sum; the plan was initially not carried out. Through interception of letters, the plot was uncovered in time and Lopez and two of his co-conspirators were arrested. After the accomplices confessed to their crime, Lopez, when faced with the weight of the evidence, had no choice but to confess his guilt. After a major criminal trial in London, Lopez and his aides were hanged.” (138)
  • See ‘Thurloe Papers’ under Evidence for more examples of Jewish spying.

Whitehall Conference Chutzpah

• The Jews with pure Chutzpah celebrate the Whitehall Conference as a victory, despite it being a rout, proving that there is no limit to their almost admirable insolence.
  • “Cromwell had recognised from the outcome of the conference that there was still great resistance to Jewish readmission. Public opinion, which even Cromwell could not completely ignore when making his decisions, was bitterly opposed to the Jews entering England. The people could foresee the long-term consequences of approving Cromwell’s request, even if Cromwell himself was incapable of doing so. As a consequence, there can be no doubt that the so-called Whitehall Conference was a complete failure for the Jews. Nevertheless, in apparent obliviousness to the reality of what actually took place in December 1655, in 1906 the occasion of the Whitehall Conference was celebrated with a pompous banquet in London to mark its 250th anniversary.” (208)

Violet’s Petition

• See ‘Violet’s Petition’ under Quotes for Thomas Violet’s extensive description of the Jews as a “Swarme of locusts”, “plague”, and “scum”, among other things. (237)

1701 Law Protecting Converts

• The Law
  • “If the child of any Jewish Parent is converted to the Christian Religion, or is desirous of Embraceing it; upon Application to the Lord Chancellor he may compell any such Parent to give his Child a sufficient Maintenance, in Proportion to his Circumstances.” (286)
• An Amusing Anecdote
• “A young Jew having embraced the Christian religion, and, becoming consequently disinherited, bethought himself to take advantage of Queen Anne’s Act. He accordingly sued his father for ‘a sufficient maintenance in proportion to his circumstances.’ The parent was not disposed to submit to the act without a struggle; he determined therefore, to take legal action. Having laid the case before the most learned counsel of the day, and having offered a lucrative reward, if the lawyer could devise any plan whatever, so as to outwit his apostate son, the jurist promised to set his wits to work, and he thought a way of escape might yet be found. He said, moreover, that if the Hebrew client would call upon him the following day, accompanied with the promised fee, he would tell him of the best mode of defence to be adopted against his son. The Hebrew departed from him in better spirits than he entered into the barrister’s house, and with characteristic punctuality he presented himself once more at the appointed hour before his legal champion.

• ‘Well, Sir,’ said the Hebrew, ‘I hope it is all right, and that that rascal of a son of mine will not be allowed to eat pork at my expense.’
• ‘T have hit upon a plan, after a sleepless night of cogitation,’ rejoined the counsel, ‘and it is the only plan that will effectually prevent him eating pork or anything else at your expense.’
• The barrister paused, the client knew its meaning.
• ‘There, Sir, your eyes shall not have been deprived of sleep, nor your eyelids from slumber for nothing. I hope you will consider this fee ample, and let your mouth utter the plan.’
• The lawyer secured the liberal reward, and then with judicial gravity propounded his matured plan.
• ‘The only way, dear Sir, to neutralise that obnoxious Act of Her Majesty, is, for you to be publicly baptised into the Christian Church. You see the law does not provide for Christian children, but it does for Jewish.’
• ‘And is this the only plan?’ exclaimed the irritated client. ‘The only plan, I assure you; and its formation deprived me of last night’s sleep.’
• ‘I wish then you slept and never awoke,’ muttered the disappointed Hebrew, and departed.” (286)

Romaine Quote Along with Aldag’s Laconic German Comment

• Romaine: “Their Crimes deserve these severe Lashes of Conscience, and how severe they are you may read in their very Faces. You know a Jew at first Sight. And what then are his distinguishing Features? Examine what it is peculiar that strikes you. It is not his dirty Skin, for there are other People as nasty; neither is it the Make of his Body, for the Dutch are every whit as odd, aukward Figures as the Jews. But look at his Eyes. Dont you see a malignant Blackness underneath them, which gives them such a Cast, as bespeaks Guilt and Murder? You can never mistake a Jew by this Mark, it throws such a dead, livid Aspect over all his Features, that he carries Evidence enough in his Face to convict him of being a Crucifier.'” (325)
  • Aldag: “Harsh words, but the truth is always bitter.” (325)

Ditty from the Year of Battle 1753

• “Till her [Britannia’s] Sons prove honest, just, and true, And learn to hate, that hateful Thing, a JEW” (327)

Public Pressure on MPs in 1753

• During the Year of Battle of 1753, the people fought to overturn the unpopular Jewish naturalization bill, which treacherous officials had passed. The effort included amusing shenanigans.
• “A Kent MP had the misfortune of voting for the bill, the news which spread like wildfire throughout his constituency and especially his hometown. Great excitement gripped the population, and they were quite angry with their honourable representative. He had no idea of the storm that was brewing when he returned to his constituency a short time later, happy to have escaped the sweltering heat of London in the summer. His path took him past his local public house, where he knew his best friends were having lunch at the time. He quickly decided to enter the bar to proudly introduce himself to his electorate. When he entered, his expectations were not disappointed: upright and sedate citizens of the small town were gathered and were discussing the latest events with each other. He greeted them with a hello and asked to sit with them, as was his old habit. In his joy at seeing them again, he had not noticed that everything had fallen silent when he entered, and so was shocked when his friends expressed great regret that he would not be able to eat with them because they had unfortunately ordered pork to be served. Only then did the poor sinner realise the situation and was left in a state of bewilderment. It took him a moment to recover, and only the booming laughter of those present broke him out of his dismay. Grabbing his hat and rushing away was one thing. On his way he passed the market square and, to his joy, spied a long-time friend and loyal voter. Glad to have found someone — and this person in particular — to talk to, he rushed to greet him. He immediately bombarded him with a barrage of questions and, in his lingering state of confusion, wanted to get more detailed information from his friend about the attitude of the others. When he paused for a moment after a question, in the hope of getting a response, he saw that his friend was looking at him interestedly but in silence. The honourable member paused and impatiently pressed him with questions about why the hell he wasn't answering. His friend surely had to hear and understand him. Without batting an eye, the brave man replied: ‘Eh..., I can hear you — but unfortunately I can’t speak Hebrew.’ No sooner had he said these words, he left the astonished parliamentarian standing there in the middle of the square.”
• “We learn, by a Gentleman just come from Cambridge, that a certain Great Man, who had lately made a Visit there, was, on his Departure, saluted by the People, who followed him in Crowds quite through the Town, with Hail, King of the Jews!”
• Chants of “No Jews” (331)

Anti-Pelham Cartoon

• The Pelhams bore special responsibility for the bill’s passage. (364)
• “Apparently the hatred against the younger Pelham [an important Parliament member] was even stronger, because he was mocked in a caricature even after his death. Henry Pelham died on March 6th, 1754, and the cartoon that appeared shortly afterwards shows his entry into hell, led by a demon. It is captioned: ‘His Arrival at his Country Retirement & Reception’.”
• For more amusing Political Cartoons from the 1753 Year of Battle, see pages 349-353.

Sir John Bernard’s Ironic Bill to Make Bribery Legal

• He moved to do so since it was so common.
• “On February 7th, 1754, Sir John Barnard, whom we have already encountered, moved to have the ‘Bribery Oath’ repealed in Parliament. He justified his request by saying that if this oath remained valid, the newly elected members of Parliament would almost without exception commit perjury when taking their seats, since generalised bribery was already evident to everyone.” (363)

Patrick Colquhoun Quotes

• Jews were “...employing themselves in every mischievous device that can render them nuisances in society.” (401)
• “The mischiefs which must result from the increase of this depraved race, arising from the natural course of population, is so obvious, that a remedy cannot be too soon applied.” (401)
• See ‘Patrick Colquhoun: Founder of England’s Modern Police Force on Jewish Criminality’ under Quotes.

Ben Shapiro in 19th Century London

• A vivid if unflattering firsthand description of London’s Jews
• “Here, every face is of the shape, and somewhat of the complexion, of a turkey egg; every brow pencilled in an arch of exact ellipse; every nose modelled after the proboscis of a Toucan; locks as bushy and black as those of Absalom abound, and beards of the patriarchal ages.” (558)

Advice: Do the Opposite of What Jews Say!

• MP Sir Tollemache Sinclair humorously observes that Jews, as a rule, have opposite interests than everyone else.
• “I think I have established that the Jews are not, and never have been, worthy of our esteem and regard, and that they are the eternal and implacable enemies of the Christian; consequently, it would be madness to follow their advice to go to war with Russia, but wisdom always to take the opposite course to that which they recommend.” (591)

Jewish Science: Ritual Slaughter Is Actually Humane!

• The Jews falsified science to say that barbaric, bronze age Jewish ritual slaughter is the most human way to slaughter animals.
• “In the same year, the Jews in Switzerland were disturbed by a bill that would ban the kosher slaughter of cattle [shechita]. If the bill were to be made law, international Jewry feared that this might incentivise other nations to follow suit. And once again it was Lord Rosebery who intervened on behalf of Jewish interests by passing this communication on to Lord Ripon at the Foreign Office. An article was immediately published in the British Medical Journal stating that, according to scientists, the Jewish method of slaughter was the least cruel and most effective, an article which was circulated in Switzerland.” (597)

It’s a Wonderful Shylock

• Jewess Violet Guttenberg wrote a novella about how England would be lost without the Jews. Think: It’s a Wonderful Life, but for Jews.
  • Ironically, it’s a naked admission of Jewish money power.
• “The author narrates a love story between a Jew and an Englishwoman, the daughter of the staunchly anti-Semitic Prime Minister Moore. The two young people get married without his knowledge.

• Shortly afterwards, at the request of the Prime Minister, a law is passed requiring all Jews to leave England. As a consequence, most of them then emigrate to Palestine, with the result that England's economy virtually comes to a standstill. There is unemployment and poverty everywhere.
• The Prime Minister's daughter accompanies her husband to Palestine, and when she later returns home for a visit, she finds her father made a nervous wreck because he is still preoccupied almost exclusively with the Jewish Question. A member of the government tells her openly: ‘England can not get along without Jewish money and Jewish brains; and she’s shipped all the best of it away — sent it to Palestine to enrich the Holy Land.’
• The Prime Minister eventually changes his mind, repeals the expulsion law, and because all the Jews return, England is rich and happy again:
• ‘Moore — the anti-Semite — is dead.’ ‘And Mr. Moore the Christian statesman lives!’” (618-619)

Wretched Refuse for Thee, but Not for Me!

• Brazen Jewish double standard: they were selective in who they allowed to come to their colonies, filtering out the worst immigrants and sending them to England.
• “So much is this the fact that Mr. Zangwill [Jewish NGO executive] , when recently discussing the proposed East African colony for Jews, made this remarkable statement — he said, ‘the colony was not to be the dumping ground for refugees.’” (624)

Sir Edmund Davis: “Art Collector”

• “... in the Jewish Year Book [he] is referred to simply as an art collector” but he was chairman or a director of 36 companies (741)
  • Including the crucial British South Africa Company (740)

Let’s Get Down to Business to Defeat the Huns

• “I challenge any officer who was on the Western Front, whether in the artillery or infantry, to deny that the men we used to get as reinforcements, even as early as the autumn of 1916, were often among the poorest specimens of manhood we had ever seen — dull-witted, delicate, toothless, and often rheumatical. Thousands of these men are taking wardisability pensions today, who ought never to have crossed the water, who only crossed it in order to be invalided home again...’” -A.M. Ludovici (789)